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crackedshe rests her head on her pillow as the tears begin to flow.
her body trembles and curls into itself.
she pulls the blanket up over her head and sobs even harder into it.
she feels like a lost cause, no hope is within her reach.
her heart has shattered one to many times and all she wants to do is fade away
like the clouds after a violent storm.
she doesn't want to hold onto this life anymore.
she wants to be free of this pain.
she wants to be happy,
but cruel fate has denied it more times than she can count.
no one can save her, not even him.
she won't let him
even though he is all she wants.
he is her everything and she doesn't want to lose him
but she believes she will never be good enough.
she believes she is too broken, too cracked
but she gives him her all and it seems to be good enough
though she still is afraid to believe it.
this girl, my dear reader, is me. i am too broken, too cracked, too faded to believe it.
simply methey call me an outcast
because i live my faith.
they call me odd
because i am myself.
they call me a drag
because i am broken.
they call me a bitch
because i don't put up with their shit.
they call me the worst
because it really is true.
i am me, take it or leave it.
i have very few that i love and very little give.
i want to give more but i simply don't have it.
i'm trying, though, to gain more confidence.
i'm trying to love a little more and regret a little less
despite the pain and demons that live inside me
i'm trying my best
and one day i promise
i will be better than this.
young lovefalling in love when you are young is so very difficult.
it's heart breaking
it's emotionally draining
it's soul breaking
but it's so very worth it in the end if you are willing to fight for it.
Tomboy She prefers pink,
I prefer navy blue.
She wears Uggs,
I wear Vans.
She wears tight, low cut sweaters,
I wear oversized hoodies.
She wears charm bracelets,
I wear paracord bands.
She curls her hair,
I straighten mine.
She hates Coldplay.
I'M A HARDCORE COLDPLAYER. HOW DO YOU NOT LOVE THEM?!
She hates skateboarding,
Dude, I board every day.
She's putting on an act,
I'm tryin' to be myself.
I'm comfortable with who I am.
She's a girly girl.
I'M A TOMBOY.
OverthinkingI get depressed so easily sometimes.
My mind just wants to relax, but I'm too busy overthinking.
Thats when the false hope and high expectations set in and all of the made up scenarios start playing in my head.
Then depression hits me like a ton bricks.
I hate feeling like this. It kills me every time.
All I want is to feel okay...is that really too much to ask?
move onmove on. move on. move on.
that's all i've ever been told.
get over it. he doesn't love you. move on.
you're torturing him by pursuing what you don't have.
he's gone, gone, gone. he will never love you. move on.
but the truth is i know i should, but i don't want to
i still love him so much...
but i need to move on, move on, move on.
PiecesNo one wants to read of a sad,
Lonely, broken-hearted girl
Who wishes nothing more that to see
The boy whom she loves smile again.
She can't put down what she feels on
Paper with the words the English language can offer.
Not a single adjective could describe the heart-break she feels
For the boy who never broke her heart, but mended the pieces of it
With his own.
So Close, Yet So FarWe're so close, yet so far.
We stand next to each other in the hallway and talk...
But I feel like we're so far away.
You avoid my gaze, but you speak nicely to me.
I take a step closer,
Just close enough to grab your hand.
But I resist the urge because we are too young still.
With every ounce of strength I have,
I try to keep from stumbling on my words,
But my heart beats too fast.
I try to keep as calm as you,
But I'm failing miserably in my head.
My voice is a shaky,
My whole body is trembling,
My heart says to tell him everything I'm holding in,
But my mind just barely keeps all of the words from escaping.
We're so close, yet so far.
And I don't know how long it will last,
Because I love him,
And would do anything to keep us from drifting apart.
The Voice of HeavenThe sweetest music fills the atmosphere
The voice of heaven itself
Surfing on waves of air
Sound so pleasant, beyond orgasmic
Listen to the subtle facets of its audible splendor
Every measure, every crescendo, every lick
Everyone is savored
Never have ears been so graced
Graced by such a precious lullaby
Transcendent silvery tones caress the soul
Knees begin to buckle
Everything fades in haunting mist
Oh, harmonious ballad!
The notes sparkle along their silky path
So smooth, so lovely
Sing them forever
Sing sweet love,
Your beautiful heart let shine!
Light up the darkness
Play your songs again and again
Play your songs in my heart
In the heart you've captured and chained to yours
If only everyone could know their magick
Those notes will resonate in me til I die and ever after
I love you, voice of heaven
two can play at this gamehelp.
my heart beats
and my lungs
swell with air,
but I swore
my life would
cease to be
if I could
no longer call
you mine. please
Lost and FoundHe has prayed as much
as he said "I love you"
in both cases
they were inaudible
Occasionally you can hear him
when he traces the outline of you
similar to the way
a stroke induced December
remembers to speak spring
like he's seen you before in his dreams
You can hear him
when his eyes linger at your smile
as if he could find faith
from your light
trapped, imbedded in insecurity
his way is a broken record even the deaf could listen to
He will not say I love you
not because he doesn't
but because you can not hear a man
you have yet to meet
but when you do, oh god, you will be brutally aware
Because with love like his
you could drown twice
and not want to come up for air
By Suzanne Karbach 27th July 2014
sugarclawyou sang, watermystic
rosehips swaying two hearts
to a shell
and i, niagara
fell beneath, earth tesselate
seeping in infinite squares
but this is no desert love
story you are telling, lies
stretched over acres
o' your sweetscented mouth
One Year // TimelessOne Year // Timeless
I wanted to write something,
About being with you for
A whole year.
But I can’t. (So I won’t)
Because it doesn’t feel like
A whole year.
I feel like I just met you,
I feel like I’ve always known you,
There is something meaningless about
“A whole year”.
It feels timeless.
One Year // Timeless
I know from eighth grade Science Class
That energy cannot be
Created (nor destroyed).
This, I’m quite sure, is the case with how I feel about you.
I think this feeling goes beyond me,
It stretches back through time,
And has lived many lives.
It started, I believe, as a far off sun.
All passion and fire and boiling,
Existing that way for many billions of years,
Until it compressed and
All that energy released into the cosmos,
Undamaged, undestroyed, (uncreated).
For a while after that, it existed as the stars.
Every last twinkling one in the sky,
It nestled a bit of itself into.
FallFall has heavily come upon the woods.
The trees are bare, and the air is crisp and cool.
The floor of the woods is crunchy to the step, and the feel of concealment is scarce.
The winds makes the trees sound as though they are whispering to one another.
Deep, dark secrets only the trees know.
I've come to love it here, it's somewhere I can be free for a few hours.
Time disappears, and all of my
Worries float away on the creek.
There is no nicer place to live then here.
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More